O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

Lately I have been totally drawn to the lyrical content of hymns. Specifically hymns written by Charles Wesley. After hearing "Come Thou Long Expected Jesus" this month and actually listening to the lyrics, I have to say that is probably one of my favorite Christmas songs.

Anyways, I was reading through a few of his hymns this morning, and there was one that stuck out quite powerfully this morning. Here is the Hymn: (I've boldened the parts I'm focusing on):

Lamb of God Whose Bleeding Heart - by Charles Wesley

1 LAMB of God, whose bleeding love We now recall to mind, Send the answer from above, And let us mercy find; Think on us, who think on thee; And every struggling soul release; O remember Calvary, And bid us go in peace!

2 By thine agonizing pain And bloody sweat, we pray, By thy dying love to man, Take all our sins away: Burst our bonds, and set us free; From all iniquity release; O remember Calvary, And bid us go in peace!

3 Let thy blood, by faith applied, The sinner's pardon seal; Speak us freely justified, And all our sickness heal; By thy passion on the tree, Let all our griefs and troubles cease; O remember Calvary, And bid us go in peace!

4 Never will we hence depart, Till thou our wants relieve, Write forgiveness on our heart, And all thine image give! Still our souls shall cry to thee, Till perfected in holiness; O remember Calvary, And bid us go in peace!

There is a famous Christmas song "O Christmas tree". Here is one of it's verses:
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Your beauty green will teach me
That hope and love will ever be
The way to joy and peace for me.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas tree,
Your beauty green will teach me


I don't know about you but one of my favorite things about Christmas is all the decorations and especially the "piece de resistance" - the Christmas tree. I love the lights, the sparkles, the ornaments, the memories, the legacies and stories as many ornaments carry special meaning or are inherited. We often gather around to look at it, to admire it, to fill it with good things. I want to ask you to take time to remember another tree. It really does give me joy to look at the trees all decorated and at night when all the lights are off and only the lights on the tree burst through the dark, it really brings a serenity to my evening.

As I read this hymn, my thoughts turned to another tree. A red stained tree, a tree set up in a place for all people to stare at, to look at, to be focused on. A tree that wreaked of my sins. A tree that cried out with the world that their Creator was dying. A tree that held up the Lamb of God - who takes away the sins of the world. A tree that is so hard to look at because it cuts me deep. It humbles me. And yet if I take time to look at that tree - my Jesus - "By your passion on the tree - let all our griefs and troubles cease. O remember Calvary and bid us go in peace!". The Christmas Carol is kind of right. If I focus on a tree, the tree, my Saviors tree - it "teaches" me that "hope and love will ever be, the way to joy and peace for me."

So as I see the beautiful trees this season, my mind will now shift to another bright shining, gift giving, beautifully decorated tree. We may celebrate Jesus' birth the 25th but his birth represents far more than a babies cry. It represents my Lord's plan: "For God did not send His son into the world to condemn it, but to Save the world through Him."

I wrote this this morning and pray it blesses you as it blesses me. Let us take a moment as we look at those beautiful tree to think of another more Glorious tree.


Glorious red stained tree
The vision of you summons me
To look deep within my heart
To unbusy my life and instead impart
The truth of what my Savior planned
To unstain the world from the sins of man
All God's passions laid on that tree
To deliver thee, to deliver me
Born to die, my Jesus came
Lamb of God, born and slain
Now justified we can stand
Before our Savior at God's right hand
Shouldering my wretched sin
So God, in me, will only see Him
Pardoned, Redeemed, Saved am I
That's what I see when I take the time
To study that Glorious red stained tree
The vision of you summons me
and fills me with God's holy peace

Angels rejoice, tantrums come, love them even when it hurts......

This blog has good news, bad news (well for Gino and I anyways), and then more good news.

First, on a cold November evening, Thursday, the 7th - if you listened real hard or at least closed your eyes and envisioned it - angels were joining Gino and I in rejoicing over Sean deciding to be a believer in Jesus Christ. (Luke 15:7) After asking many questions and dealing with fears and nightmares (that's a whole other blog), and after hearing since he was 2 - precious songs he loves to make up to Jesus, it was time. It was time to ask him if he was ready to decide if he wanted to be friends with Jesus, if he believed he needed Jesus and if he wanted the gift of God's Holy Spirit to live in his heart and guide him through his journey here on earth. The awesome thing is in my heart and Gino's - we know without a doubt this is sincere. 4 years old - his child like faith astounds me. The prayers and words that come out of his mouth sometimes leave me in tears and speechless. And yet, he is still 4. It is our job to make sure this seed of faith remains cultivated, pruned, watered, cared for, so it will grow.

So the bad news (sort of)....well of course after this happened Sean has been tested all over the place. He still astounds me as he is gifted with honesty (for the most part). Yesterday we were walking back to the car after getting him his own Bible, (He's so excited and it glows in the dark so that is pure boy awesomeness. It made my heart sing when he asked to sleep with it), and I asked him why he was having such a hard time obeying. You know what he said, "Well mom, sometimes I just get tired of obeying." I had to smile a bit because that raw honesty is hard to find. Don't we all feel like that sometimes We just get tired of obeying.  He even told us early this week that he felt a burning in his tummy and felt the Holy Spirit tell him to stop doing something so he did. So there is this tug of war  - visible tug of war going on inside him.

Today of all days has been difficult and it's only 11:30am here. Why? Sean came in at 6:00 am to ask to brush his teeth, (yes I'm glad he has good hygiene ethics but really there's new toothpaste he wanted). After telling him to wait till after breakfast and to go back to bed, he decided he would disobey and also bring his baby brother in with him. Hugh then ate toothpaste from the trash (gag) and Sean found that hilarious which Hugh liked so he kept at it. Wrong choice! Well again Sean said he was tired of obeying. So he decided to tell his brother to put all their play dough into his teacup (with tea in it) and then proceeded to urge his brother to drink it. (I of course heard all this and walked in on them) Sean immediately chose to blame his brother. So he has been spending time cleaning every piece of play dough off the floor and is now spending time writing "Don't tell Hugh to disobey".  This is what you would call the pruning stage. While I love his honesty and would love to brush this off as 4 year old behavior I cannot. Not if I want him to understand that there's consequences to our actions even when forgiveness is in place. The verse in Proverbs 3:11-12 (also Hebrews 12:5-6) "My child, don't ignore it when the Lord disciplines you, and don't be discouraged when the Lord disciplines you, and don't be discouraged when he corrects you. For the Lord corrects those he loves, just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights."  Proverbs 13:24 "If you refuse to discipline your children, it proves you don't love them; if you love your children, you will be prompt to discipline them." 

 More good news. It wasn't till Sean asked me to explain why disciplining him means I love him that I understood God's reasoning for disciplining us. At times we see Him as a harsh God, as unmerciful. Just like Sean sees me right now. But as I explained that when I was little I had consequences and even now when I disobey I have consequences he understood. He didn't like it but he understood. See I am trying to show him that it is better to do what pleases God than to do whatever he wants. God says "If you love me then obey me." This is what brings God pleasure. What makes him smile. Just like when I obeyed my parents, it brought them smiles and pleasure and it showed them I trusted in their guidance. How often do I go my own way because I'm tired of obeying, because I'm not trusting in God's plans for me. And yet staying in God's will is for my benefit. Sean obeying me is for his benefit. It's teaching him to act kindly, gently, lovingly, etc. It teaches him that even when it's hard and tiring, that to do what is right is better. Consequences come in all forms. Sometimes it's us learning how to clean up our own mess, sometimes it's on our hands and knees scrubbing play dough off the ground, sometimes it's a swat, sometimes it's missing out on dessert, etc. The list goes on. It's my way of pruning him so he can grow and flourish. But it's humbling to me because I need to recognize this in my own life and see that my God is a good father who disciplines me because he loves me and wants me to flourish. He wants us all to live a life, a life abundantly. Not to wither and fade. Not to just be good to be good. He wants me to know I need him.

So it's pruning season in this household. I honestly hate it and now I realize God doesn't like it either. It hurts my heart and it often effects our day. I can't imagine what God must be thinking when I choose to disobey - how it hurts his heart and effects His plans. He may be Almighty God, who knows all - but just because He knows what we will choose doesn't mean it doesn't hurt his heart. He is the creator of feelings, he is the master of feelings. I often wonder if his agony and hurt is more than we can ever fathom. Just as his joy over our obedience can be only slightly seen through a parent-child relationships.

So today I am thankful that God is using this season of pruning, to prune my heart as well. That as I type this my little boy sitting next to me, is hugging me in the midst of tears and writing. That he knows in his heart I love him. God may I cling to you in the midst of my tears and when I go through pruning. May I always know in my heart....you love me.

Albania

Gino is back home. Still getting adjusted to the time difference.  Here is a video put together by one of the team mates. We wanted to share this with all of you as well. God bless -

A glimpse at Gino's last trip...

Gino has been working hard at getting the details on his last trip to Kosovo done which will be sent out to our team. It's long but it's detailed and will share about each place visited. (If you aren't part of our team and would like to be, feel free to contact us.) One of the teammates put this video together and we wanted to share it with those who wish to see a bit of what went on while they were there. Thanks to all who were praying for him and us while he was there.

Painted Prayer

Many times God will use a song or a passage in scripture or even a sermon to plant or burn an image in my mind. I cannot let it go at times. This week a song has been in my heart, actually it's been in my heart for a few weeks and I've been wanting to paint but haven't been able to. I've attached the song for those who'd like to hear it. It's called "Set a Fire" by Will Reagan and United Pursuit. I kept envisioning a ballet dancer dressed in a costume that looked like swirls of fire and dancing in a way that looked like fire was bursting around her. I was finally able to sit down and paint today. I call my paintings "painted prayers" because honestly I'm praying these songs, scriptures, and sermons over myself, family, and others depending on the picture. In this painting the dancer is holding onto what looks like ribbon. It's to represent the holy spirit pouring out from her. It's floating a bit wildly and slightly out of her control. I hope and pray that I live madly in love with my Savior. A love that lights all around me - to a point that it's uncontainable or uncontrollable. I hope this painted prayer will encourage you and make you smile and say "I want more of you God, I want more of you God." - Love Laura

One Wish...

2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed away and everything is NEW."

Romans 12:2 "Do no be conformed to this present world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may test and approve what is the will of God - what is good and well -pleasing and perfect."

I wanted to share with all of you what God has been doing in my life personally these past 6 months.  God has been transforming me and changing me and stretching me and challenging me in ways I would never have even fathomed or thought possible years ago. I am learning that God can use us in so many different ways. And every day, every week, every month, every year - can and will look different when you make yourself available to His will for your life. What do I mean? God has taken this terribly shy, fearful, homebody, introvert - and just turned me upside down. And I am saying "this is good". This is hard, but this is good. I could tell you 6 months ago that you were crazy if you thought I'd be called an artist or painter. I'd have called you insane if you thought I'd make an good Sunday school teacher and would turn down singing in church because really my passion was now to teach 6-11 year olds. I would say you were crazy if you told me I'd look forward to every Sunday being with those kids and digging into God word. I would have said you were crazy if you told me I would commit to doing street evangelism in my community - let alone willing to even think about doing it. And yet here I am about to share about a specific challenge God brought before me and I'm so glad he did. 

A few weeks ago Gino came home from his early Friday morning prayer group and said that Richard Sharp (he is part of OM) was going to have a booth at our Founder's Day Carnival.  My neighbor thought of me and wanted to know if I'd be a part of her group. They were going to be doing his "One Wish" outreach. What is "One Wish" you say. Well I'm glad you asked. This is an amazing foundational tool that Richard Sharp has created throughout years of doing street evangelism. This man and his sweet wife Rachel love the Lord so much. They genuinely love people and want them to have a friendship with God. They care - you can hear it in their voices when they talk to you. You basically ask a stranger a question and then use a bracelet, if they allow you to, to explain God's wish for their life. There's more but pause so I can give you my dilemma. 

I am very shy. Approaching strangers is a nightmare for me. I stumble over my words, I worry how will I look to them, will they hear me, will they think I'm crazy. As you can see, it's a very "me" centered type fear. Well I think I looked wide eyed at Gino and said "what?!?" a few times to him. He kindly assured me he hadn't committed to it for me. To which I replied - I will pray about it. A knot had already formed in my stomach. I also had a shouting match with God in my head because Gino had been so excited when he originally heard about this and was even wanting to blog about it and share it with our churches back home to see if they'd want some of the bracelets and tracts. I remember saying "What the heck!!! Lord you know Gino was so excited about this. Why in the world am I being asked to do this? Why?????" Surely you don't want me to do this right? Right?" - As I wrestled with this over the weekend, while the kids were playing out front I ran into Penny my neighbor. She asked about what I thought and I told her I'd pray about it but I was scared because I tend to stress out on what to say after "Hi, how are you?". She laughed and said "well that gives the Holy Spirit room to speak and lead us." That stayed with me. Also as I journaled if I should do it - the song "I'm not ashamed of the gospel" by Hillsong popped into my head over and over again." I knew in my heart from the beginning God wanted me to do this. If I was too afraid to say yes - then I'm ashamed of my God. There is a serious problem if I am ashamed of my God.  So I told Gino - I'm suppose to say yes. There's nothing to pray about anymore. I'm going to say yes. I had peace about it until the day of. I kept praying that God would just open my mouth to speak like he did for the prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah. I prayed that the Holy Spirit would give me courage and a voice because I felt I was like Moses.  I am not skilled in speech Lord. 

So Friday night came and I went. It was for an hour as there were many who volunteered to work in shifts. So now I will return to what the point of what this event was about. "One Wish". We were to approach people (I was paired with Penny) wearing our One Wish T-shirt and One wish bracelet. We were to ask them, "Have you been asked the One wish question." If they were interested we'd ask them. "If you could have 1 wish from God for you today, what would it be?" Depending on the answer we would ask them if we could say a 1 sentence prayer just asking God to help their wish come true. We then would ask them if they knew that God has 1 wish for them? We then would ask them if we could quickly show them on our bracelet which had 4 pictures - what God's wish for them was.  I will not go through everything but if you want to learn more - please let us know. This is something that you can use anywhere. Richard and his wife have used this at airports, getting a haircut, friends, family, talking to someone in line or at checkout, etc. It's such an awesome tool that you can use. Such a sincere question. You can also look at www.onewish4u.com to learn more. 

So I was scared. But Richard Sharp said "you're scared, I'm scared, let's all be scared together." Gino also reminded me gently "Laura just remember why you are doing this. This is all for the love of people. You love them, you want them to be aware of God's hope and love." I still could barely eat but it helped. So I went.  I realized as we were there that God was giving me training. He allowed me to pray with 2 women. Both said they were Christians but they let us into their lives. They got to a point where they shared with us and we were able to pray for them. One was very reserved especially but by the end she and I were chatting and talking about kids and she allowed me to pray for her teenage son to make wise choices because she was nervous about leaving him alone the carnival. I was terrified about approaching people but I could see God had surrounded me with such an amazing group of women and he was showing me how to do this. How to be genuine, how to love strangers. I feel like God said "My daughter you are being trained. You thought I was going to use you to speak into someone's life but I am hear to speak into yours. Learn from these godly men and women." It was an amazing night and honestly I felt like the time went by so quick. I had an urge to keep doing this. Who am I? Who is this girl I see in the mirror. Who is the person I've become? Well, as we drove home the ladies were saying how we should keep doing this, keep practicing this so that this becomes part of us. We decided to try to do this once a month. And I said yes without hesitation. What? Lord you have transformed me because a couple weeks ago - I would have avoided my neighbor and hid in the closet. What mighty powers our God has. So God willing, November 1st will be our 2nd outing as a group and I pray that God will give me the strength to approach at least 1 person. The night I went there - 2 people for sure decided to accept God's hand of Friendship. To be a part of that event was so encouraging to me. I know God has his reasons for taking me there. I'm so glad He did. 

I wanted to thank our ministry team and to encourage them that we are being given opportunities to reach not only across the world but also in our own backyard. Thank you for being a part of this. Please be praying for the people who came across us that weekend. Pray that the seeds planted grow. Pray that those who did accept God's hand of friendship will get plugged into a good church and get into God's word. Pray that God will give me boldness in times when I'm scared. Pray that I get an opportunity to talk to even just 1 person through God's 1 wish for them. Pray for Richard Sharp's ministry to grow. This is such an awesome thing he is doing. He has used this all over the world. Jesus will always use us in different ways but when it comes to sharing God's hope - this is such a great place to start.

Let us all allow you to transform us God. Help me lay aside pride and my own agenda and instead seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness. May we all be allowed to impact this world for your glory and to help lead others into an eternal friendship with you. Amen.

Eternal Tree

This is a bit late as I painted this a couple weeks ago but I have been waiting for words to put to this picture. Well today God finally gave me the words. The painting is based primarily on Galatians 5:22-23 "When the Holy Spirit controls our lives, He will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Here there is no conflict with the law." and I just read today Psalms 92:12-14 "But the godly will flourish like palm trees and grow strong like the cedars of Lebanon. For they are transplanted to the Lord's own house. They flourish in the courts of our God. Even in old age they still produce fruit, they will remain vital and green." I read Psalms 92 after I wrote the words to this picture so I can tell you that all of this was definitely inspired NOT by myself. I drew this painting after the Bible study I went to came to an end. We had studied the fruits of the spirit and how they apply to everyday living. A different picture came to my mind and I was picturing a tree with roots stretching and intertwining with one another. I saw how: as I read God's word, spend time with him, talk to him, pray to him and thank Him for what He is doing in my life - that these spiritual qualities grow. My patience with my children miraculously grows, my desire to be kind and help others and not sit on the couch because I'm tired grows, I pictured these strong roots growing beneath the pillar. And I envisioned a full tree blooming and could see that Paul was right in 1 Corinthians 13. Love is what remains. The harvest is love. Because to love well - we need all the qualities of the Holy Spirit - at least I know I do. Without Him I wither and become dry. I hope this picture and poem encourages you as God has encouraged me through the process and also reminded me to grow - grow my roots deep. May we ever flourish, even in old age, may we remain vital and green. Amen

Poems and Paintings

I'm not sure how many know but I am a bookworm, I am a journaler. I have always loved to write, not just write anything but write to God and about God. Oh the therapy sessions my journal has brought me. But that's a whole other blog post that I probably won't write. Anyways, poems and lyrics from songs have also been passions of mine. I've always loved to write and often I have found that as I got busy with life, even as a teenager, I was good at suffocating that passion out. I put very little weight on it. And there were years where I didn't write and also didn't even hum a song. Desert years they call them. But as I've had time, lots of time especially while Gino has been on trips, God's Holy Spirit has stirred in me those passions again as well as semi-new ones. I used to love to draw, although I quickly stopped or would hide my work, as I often compared myself to others. But lately when I read His word, or do the women's bible study I'm doing. or hear a song, or hear a sermon, or hear about a friend suffering - a picture comes to my mind. I fought it for awhile, journaling about these pictures instead, trying to remember the details when it hit me. I needed to paint. I needed to paint these pictures out. So while Gino was away I did my first two (believe it or not with crayon and crayola paint). I laughed because I thought of my Jr. Highers that I used to make paint and I thought, "they could do way better than I just did." But I also smiled because the picture in my head was finally on paper. Maybe not as refined as I pictured it but it was there. I am going to share the last two paintings I've done as God gave me words to these painting and I hope and pray they encourage someone, uplift someone, breathe fresh air on someone, not because I am a fantastic poet or artist, but because God can use our meek offerings and turn them into blazing fires. He can take our scribbles and fill them with hope, encouragement and life.  I pray this is the case. Love - Laura

Painting #1 - Dancers Prayer

Painting #2 - Push Forward Through

I am...

Earlier this week I had been doing my Bible study when I was struck with a concept I never thought of before. The trinity - such a complicated term. So many examples have been given. The reason it stuck with me is my son was also asking earlier about God and how Jesus is God and God is God. ( I used water as an example - liquid,vapor,ice - still water in the end) I asked him if he understood and he said, "do I say yes???" Umm, only if you get is Sean. I see my need to be reading God's word everyday through my kids because this is deep and I find that kids ask the deepest questions and I pray God guides my every answer. I've been meaning to share this but our wireless has been down for 2 weeks and I couldn't really see myself typing this all out on my phone. So now that Internet is up and running, my kids are in bed, I have a little quiet time to put this thought down. Here we go:

As I read Colossians 1:15-17 a picture in my mind started forming. Here are the verses: "Christ is the visible image of the invisible God. He existed before God made anything at all and is supreme over all creation.  He made the things we can see and the things we can't see - kings, kingdoms, rulers, and authorities.  Everything has been created through him and for him.  He existed before everything else began and he holds all creation together."

CHRIST IS THE VISIBLE IMAGE OF GOD....hmmm. So while it doesn't mention the Holy spirit this just stirred in me a desire to really understand the trinity. Jesus is God, God the Father is God and the Holy Spirit is God. They are 3 in 1. They ARE. I have read commentaries, heard teachers explain using the 3 in 1 visual aspects of water, an apple, an egg, etc. And while those helped me, I wanted something more. So as I prayed:

This made me think of Matthew 3: 16-17 "After his baptism, as Jesus came up out of the water, the heavens were opened and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and setting on him.  And a voice from heaven said, "This is my beloved Son, and I am fully pleased with him."

So I prayed more - God how do I explain this to my children. How do I explain who you are. Exodus 3:14 "God replied, "I AM THE ONE WHO ALWAYS IS" (other translations: I am who I am or I will be what I will be), Just tell them, I AM has sent me to you.

I am no theologian. But a picture came to my mind of a woman with people coming and going in her life. From there a poem emerged and I thought I'd share. (This could apply to guys too by the way but I'm a girl so that's why I thought of this first):

I AM:
I am me
A daughter but that is just a part of me because I grew up to be
a wife
I am Me
A wife but that is just a part of me because I am now a mother
I am me
All 3 are the makeup of who
I am.

Now while the trinity always existed I thought of the Hebrew people. For years they interacted and knew of God the Father. Almighty God. When Jesus came they were introduced to a part of God they had never seen before. He was fully man yet fully God. He and the Father are one. The Hebrews that understood this got to experience a new part of God they never knew before (and we still get to now!).  Then when Jesus left the Holy Spirit was promised and given to us so that we would have God's spirit to guide us, transform us, comfort us, and seal us. The disciples got to again experience a new part of God they did not have full access too until Pentecost. So how does my poem fit into this. Well here is where I see an analogy: a person can know me as a child and then leave my life. They come back years later and I'm married. I'm not the same person they knew and yet that part of me still exists. There is a new part of me they must now get to know.  If they leave again and come back years later and I'm a mom, there is now another new side of me they must get to know. This led me to write this:

I AM:

I am
God who was, who is and will always be
I am
Christ the visible image of God
who shed my blood to set free all who believe and leave
I am the Holy spirit who stays and guides you with wisdom
and peace
All 3 are the makeup of who
I AM

I'm not sure if this will offend or encourage or help but I hope that one day I can explain this as close to the truth as possible and that the Holy Spirit will fill in the rest to my children. May we all be given deeper glimpses into our Mighty, complex, deep loving, tender God.

I AM
Those who saw me as Creator and worshipped me at the altar - I AM
I AM also the Son of God who offers more than just redeeming love
I AM the Holy Spirit residing within those who believe
And all these different parts of me make up what you call the Trinity
But in the end its much more simple : I AM WHO I AM.

May we worship and love all that you are.

God bless.

Everyday Chatter

As I was driving my kids home from picking berries (which was very fun till my oldest decided to give me attitude as if he was 14 and not 4), I was not looking forward to driving to the grocery store to run errands. I almost put on some music to kind of muffle the chatter that goes on in those back seats and give my ears and mind a bit of a break, but then my oldest asks if he can please earn a prize for knowing his Bible verse. I explained he needed to say it all the way and that he also needed to tell his dad. I also told him I was surprised he was asking this as we just had a spank and juice taken away for a week (he picked those punishments out by the way - I was gonna go for taking a toy away for a day but he kept pressing for a punishment and then proceeded to tell me he was going to pick it.) So I let him win that battle - sort of.

 Anyways in the ladies Bible study I joined we are going through a Beth Moore series that talks about the Holy Spirit. I'm loving it as one of the verses I mention constantly to my kids is Galations 5:22-23. I have to say, though, as I'm going through this study God has decided I need to better my character.  And this week has been a stretcher for me with my kiddos, especially  my eldest. I'm so glad God is at least making it clear to me that I'm being stretched because it has helped me to pray, even as my son has told me quite a few times this week that he likes dad better than me - to just smile and say "I know Sean, I know." Because if it was me - I would have been laying on the guilt trip or would have felt like the worse mom ever!

So again back to me driving to the store with my kids. Sean began trying to say his memory verse earnestly. It's 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 by the way : "Love is patient, love is kind. Love is not jealous, or boastful, or proud or rude. It does not demand it's own way, it is not irritable. It keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice over evil but rejoices with the truth. Love never gives us, love never loses faith, it always hopes, and endures through every circumstance."  He wants to earn a wallet and so I'm making sure it's earned (hey wallets are expensive and he wants one that will last till he's an adult he says). Anyways he said it pretty perfect and he said, "I should keep saying it over and over and then I won't forget it." I said he was right and that it's good to practice it so he can tell his dad. So he began practicing it and I could hear that he'd mix up the phrases or sentences and stop himself. He kept stumbling so I tried to help by saying it along with him. Well he told me quite adamantly that I needed to let him do this by himself. So rolled my eyes (he couldn't see that by way) and closed my mouth. He again proceeded and began to stumble again and started to get angry. And then this kid melted me. He stopped and said aloud, "Dear Jesus please help me have self-control. In Jesus name I pray Amen." Then he started to practice again.

Chatter - beautiful heart melting chatter. A sweet simple prayer from my son's lips. Rather than ask me he went to God for help. Rather than give into his anger, he asked God to give him self-control. (I guess he was paying attention this week as I would pray aloud some times "Lord give me patience!!") But as I drove on in silence letting my son practice - tears filled my eyes and I praised God in my heart saying, "Lord thank you for showing me that you are real to my son. Please keep him dependent on you. Please help me to be more like him - May I go to you first when I struggle. May I remember to stop what I'm doing and just give it to you. Lord thank you that my son knew at that moment that you would give him that self-control. May my faith be ever more child-like Jesus."

Daddy

I do not think that what I say may be seen as profound to many but today God spoke to my heart and I felt led to share. Today was a tough day for my Sean boy. Today videos of his father did not cut it. Today he cried this morning because he wanted to snuggle with his daddy. Today he prayed God would bring his daddy home soon. Today he cried at night because I didn't read the Bible like his daddy did and he wanted his daddy again. Tonight the videos brought a small smile to his face as he talked back to his dad. I left him with a photo album which he was looking at as I closed their door.

So what is this epiphany that came to me? I was praying this morning after Sean cried that God would comfort my son and my heart also smiled knowing how much my son loves his daddy. Kayleigh also stated this week she missed her daddy and made me send a video of her singing to him. They miss him, they smile at the videos he made and talk back to him. They light up when they see his face. They know they are loved by their Father and they love him back.

I was convicted at that thought. Do I long for my Father in heaven like my son longs for his daddy? Do I get moved to tears wishing I could just hug him or hold on to him. Do I feel unsatisfied with just hearing and reading about my Father. Do I long to just run up to him wildly and smother him with love?

I have to say that for most of my life - I never really thought about it. I mean I never thought to miss my Lord. I never thought to long to see Him so I could love him. I always focused on my limited understanding of what would end here if I went there. God has suddenly filled me with a love for him that brings me to tears when I read his word at times, that makes me smile in the early morning when I'm alone and say good morning to Him. I am finally seeing him as my daddy. And my daddy deserves my love. A love like Sean has for Gino. And so today I am sharing this because it's my prayer that we all will love our God passionately and fiercely like a child loves their father. Like a child who is loved well by their Father. Because our God in heaven loves us like no one ever can or ever will. May I love you well Jesus - to the point that I miss you everyday and long to see your face.

Psalms 84 ( a portion of it:) "How lovely is you dwelling place, O lord Almighty. For my soul longs and even faints for you. With my whole being, body and soul, I will shout joyfully to the living God.  Even the sparrow finds a home there, and the swallow builds her nest and raises her young - at a place near our altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God. How happy are those who can live in your house, always singing your praises....A single day in your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere. "

Do we impact?

Gino has been away for 1 week now. (Yes I am doing the countdown - I have 3 toddlers - you would too!!) I have heard back from Gino and so far the concerts have received good feedback. More people have come than they thought would, even drawing people from apartments that could hear them. The people were happy about them taking time to translate lyrics which opened up opportunities to talk with people and get them thinking about deeper things. They've had 2 concerts so far and a 3rd one today. They have traveling tomorrow to the south of France.  We of course will go more in detail later but for now thank you for the prayers - they are being heard and answered.

And that brings me to the topic above.  I was reading this morning Psalms 82 and part of verse 5 stuck with me quite heavily. It says "..and because they (the appointed israelite judges) are in darkness, the whole world is shaken to the core."

This verse struck me hard. It reminded me that my actions impact more than just myself. Especially as a mom with little ones who look to me to show them how to live life - my actions, my words impact.  On top of that my actions - whether I choose to live as God has asked me to live - or whether I choose to live as I please - this impacts not just me, not just my family, but does impact the world. How does it impact the world? Well I'm finding that when I am pleasing myself - I am not thinking to pray for my brother, my friend, our leaders, our world. Wouldn't it be something if all of us realized that we not only impact our life - we can impact the world. It reminds me also of Matthew 5:16 "So let your light shine before all men, that they may see your good deeds and give glory to God in heaven."

So to those who are on our team, to those who love the Lord - you can and are impacting the world. Thank you for taking time out of your busy life to spend time with our mighty God - interceding in prayer for Gino and the whole team. May you be encouraged and uplifted knowing God has chosen to impact the world through all who choose to live a life of love through Him.

I pray you will help me live in your light Lord. By your grace and strength, I can live in a way that impacts those around me and even those far away. What a gift to be used by you. Who am I? Your child whom you ransomed with a heavy price. May my love for you be evident in how I live....in how we live.

God Bless - Laura

Une peu de prévision en français (A little preview in French)

The team from Canada is here and the rehearsals and training sessions are going well. The guys are gracious enough to run around with mine and Suzie's kids after dinner and Georgia, the dancer going with the team, has been so sweet with our girls. Below are two videos showing a song written by Jon Simpson that Jon was able to translate and sing in French.  Here is just a taste of what they will be doing in France. They also sang it live with their bassist and drummer today at the "Prayer Plus" event that OM has every Thursday. Prayer Plus is a time for us to pray for missionaries around the world, for each other, etc. There's usually a time of worship with music, prayer and sharing through it.

Saturday is a full concert, including a French translator and dancing as well. We are excited and praying people are encouraged and touched. It's open to anyone who wants to come and the church we've been going to was also invited as well. We are excited especially because I (Laura) and the kids will get to see Gino play live for the very first time in a full concert. We also have good friends from Atlanta coming by and we're excited to hang out with them.

Please continue to pray for their journey.

God Bless - the Quinns

1. Gino and Jon's acoustic version:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vnt6p_SPe8
2. Live performance at OM : https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=HkR3b4-NPPU#!

SPLISH...SPLASH....

As Gino has been keeping busy practicing with Jon and going to meetings and preparing for their trip to France, the kids and I have been busy settling in, meeting new neighbor friends, taking walks to the OM office to drop off our thank you cards and chatting with people on the way.

There has been a few more eventful happenings since my last post….you know, my pajama horror story.  I’ve been meaning to blog a bit about what’s been going on but there a few things that have slowed me down.  But today the Pastor at the church we’ve been attending used Proverbs 2 as part of his sermon and I wanted to share it with you.

Proverbs 2: 7-9

“He grants a treasure of good sense to the godly. He is their shield, protecting those who walk with integrity. He guards the paths of justice and protects those who are faithful to him.  Then you will understand what is right, just, and fair, and you will know how to find the right course of action every time.”

So today started off pretty normal. We got up, had breakfast, bathed the kids, got ready for church and headed out the door. We got to church then headed out to lunch with Jon and Suzie and the kids. Got home, kids took a nap, hey even mama watched a movie and got a nap. If you are a mom, you will know this day was going really really well.  I even woke up to my sweet husband making dinner. We had dinner and then decided to go to the lake that is near us and take Sean fishing.

We got to the lake and the boys (Gino and Sean) started casting their poles. There was a group of teens out there and they kindly let our noisy family fish there too. One guy even brought a fish he caught over and let Sean pet it. Sean was excited but didn’t look to thrilled when he felt that it was slimy. The guy gave us some fishing tips and then re-joined his group. I parked Hugh and Kayleigh’s stoller and took pictures of Sean and Daddy fishing like any good mama would. Hugh began to fuss to I unlocked the stroller and took Kayleigh and Hugh for a stroll looking for turtles. (They have turtles in the lake but the pollen pretty much covered the edges so we couldn’t see much.) I parked Hugh’s stroller so we could look around and he started to fuss again so we strolled back. I noticed some bubbles coming closer to the end I was at so I told the boys. Gino sent Sean down to me and I decided I would help Sean cast.  So I parked Hugh and told Kayleigh to stand next to her brother.  Gino started to walk towards us and kindly schooled me on how to cast which is good because I was about to just cast without pressing a button that would have released the lure. That would have shown those southern kids that we were definitely not from here. Gino and I tend to not like making scenes so I’m glad he showed me. Silly scene averted.  I cast once and Sean reeled it back up. Nothing. So I went to cast it again and didn’t really cast it far so I reeled it back only to get the hook caught on the edge so as I walk towards the edge I tell the kids to stay back and all of a sudden to my left I see a stroller headed right by me and yes into the water with my little son it. I didn’t really think much except to drop the pole and jump into that water as it went face down and I knew I needed to pick it up. So God gave me superwoman strength and I somehow managed to grab the 35 lb stroller with my 26 lb son that was soaked with water,  quickly and get back to shore. All the while my eldest thinks it’s hilarious that mama just got all wet.  Usually I am the one frozen in panic when things like this happen. Gino said it was like it happened in slow motion (I agree) and for some reason God gave me the the strength to act quick and act fast. So Hugh and I were soaked – Hugh more than me. I quickly noted that I need to double check if I lock the breaks EVERY SINGLE TIME. Also my poor daughter was saying sorry over and over so God gave me the wisdom to tell her it was ok. God protected us and she didn’t mean to push Hugh; the stroller wasn’t locked. If anything, that was my fault. Sean went on to ask what my consequence would be since it was my fault. I quickly replied, “hmm, I think mama got her consequence since she’s soaking wet and her shoes have rocks in them and I can’t get them out without stepping on more rocks. “ Sean continued to chuckle.

So as you can see by my title, we made a huge splash today and we definitely showed those southern boys we are not from here. Oh well.  If you see a crazy woman jumping in a lake grabbing a stroller on YouTube, well that's just me. We all walked home and Hugh and I had a bath. It was also a blessing to see that Hugh was not afraid of the water. He splashed and had fun. I know God had us do that quickly so he could see he was safe. He was blowing bubbles and laughing.

I wanted to share this to maybe get you to smile and laugh at our silly family but also get you to see that God really is our shield and our protector. Instead of freaking out He gave me the right course of action. And wisely showed me that the next time we go, I will be bringing a towel.

TODAY

Sometimes there are days when I feel like I am stuck in a funny movie. The only bad part about a funny movie is that there has to be the character that gets laughed at. Today was one of those days and I found myself that character.  While there is not much I can offer today that is full of meaning, I thought I'd at least share a glimpse into the life of a homemaker.  You know, us mom's who the world likes portray as sitting in our jammies watching soaps and eating bon bons. Well here is how my day went.  My kiddos went to bed with what seemed a bad allergy cough as we had walked a lot outside and pollen is everywhere right now. Alas, the cough didn't disappear and Sean and Kayleigh woke up to their coughs and of course they both have a fever and Sean needs a breathing treatment right away. It's raining today so I declare it jammy day. (So maybe I fit into that "label" today).  Anyhoo, Kayleigh is coughing as well and I discover can't catch her breath either so she gets an inhaler. We have breakfast and then the kids watch a movie so I can get housework done and continue getting us out of boxes and organized. Well the movie keeps there attention for a mere few minutes and they of course decide to run around. That would be ok except for today. Because today running sends my kids into coughing fits. So I quickly finish folding blankets out of one laundry basket (yes there are more calling my name).  I read a few books to them to get them settled down and give Sean another treatment. I bribe them to take the menthol cough drops which ends up being a battle I choose to surrender as my daughter insists on taking it out of her mouth and gets the sticky slimy thing all over her, my couch, and me. Oh well, it's jammy day, good thing I didn't get dressed up.  After updating accounts and changing our address on a couple things while the kids snack on goldfish and orange juice, I quickly fold some more clothes. I get a quarter of the basket done when Hugh decides he's done and shows me by splashing his orange juice around and Kayleigh knocks her full cup of orange juice on the table. So after cleaning the floor, the table, the chair Hugh was in, it was lunch time. After lunch round #2 of cleaning the floor, the table and chair and 3 kids, we go in their room for quiet play time. Nap time finally arrives. Yeah! My husband calls me to check in and instructs me to rest. (I love my husband) So upon his suggestion I take a break. I watch a quick show and then excitedly settle in for a nap. (The kids by the way decide to stay awake but this is my sanity time so they talk and cough till I open that door.) 10 minutes later I hear the door ring twice and a knock. I get up thinking it's Gino and answer the door (again in my jammies and my bedhead) and find the two handymen coming to count the doors so we can get the door stoppers put in and to measure our bathroom walls so they can look into getting us extra storage.  All the while I am trying to naturally zip up my sweatshirt, sneak back into my room while they measure to put on socks and nonchalantly try to smooth down my hair. They leave, I hop back into bed to hear a door knock 10 minutes later. I open the door to this wonderful woman and in my mind horror sets in as I realize I had booked an appointment for Gino and I to get health insurance today. So I welcome her in just as Gino pulls up and we start talking about health insurance. I talked seriously over high deductibles and co-pays and explained my background in insurance all the while dying inside that I didn't put some freakin jeans on today. To top it off our kids got tired of being in their room (surprise surprise) so I had to be nice and let them out. I put on Nemo and had them hop in my bedroom as a treat. BAD IDEA!  Hugh screamed for freedom from his high chair. The kids jumped on our bed and went through drawers and off course fought and then laughed and then screamed throughout the whole time we were deciding what co-pays and plans looked good. And then once we chose my husband had to work, so as I signed paperwork, Gino left and my kiddos ran around me and the super nice insurance lady. (The insurance lady was sweet and patient and worked as fast as she could - I would have if I was her too but mine would have been to escape).  To top that off Sean and Kayleigh decided they needed me and clung closely. All the while coughing their little heads off. Then, Sean went into a coughing fit as the insurance lady was explaining the payments and as I was holding him, yup, he threw up all over me. So I quickly pulled my sweatshirt off. (Thank God I had a t-shirt on) and as I'm trying to calm Sean down and listen to this wonderful lady at the same time, my son continues to gag on and throw up all over my kitchen floor that Gino had just mopped the night before. All the way down. He sort of just made a huge long line, like he was trying to decorate for me. He then so sweetly pulled 1/2 a sheet of paper towel to try to clean it and almost stepped in it all the while. I quickly grabbed a towel from the hall closet while this lady is still talking as we are almost done and she has to legally do her do diligence. I make it back into the kitchen before Hugh decides to step in it. Kayleigh wants up and so does Hugh, and if you know my kids they aren't quiet when they want something. I get everything cleaned, send Sean to the bathroom to finish and the sweet woman hands me papers and says goodbye. So we are now signed up for health insurance, throw up, coughs, bedhead, jammies, and all. And I am now sitting here enjoying the Venti Carmel Machiato my husband so sweetly picked up for me, before he know about the end of my day. So if anything spiritual can be said....today I will count my blessings. Thank God for laughter because as soon as Sean threw up on me, I just wanted to burst out laughing. Don't get me wrong I wanted to cry to, but my urge to laugh drove that away. Thank God for my husband who somehow knew that his wife needed a HUGE cup of coffee at the end of this day. Thank God for God - who knew that He needed to show me I could buy insurance with jammies, bed head, and throw up, and sick kids all at once.  Good night and I hope this makes you smile. Because I know it made me. And yes, I'm still in those same darn jammies. 

How it all began...

We wanted to share a video our friends put together for us as we began our journey in joining Operation Mobilization. They did a wonderful job and we've been able to give out the dvd to potential supporters and it's been such a blessing. We wanted to upload this awhile back and kept forgetting so here it is. Jonathan and Francisco Bonilla and Pastor Marlon Valladares did an amazing job by gifting this to us. We pray it blesses you and encourages you. God has brought us so far since they've made this. We leave March 26th for Atlanta, Georgia. Thank you for all the prayers and support.

Feel free to check them out if you ever need graphics, video, photos, etc. Their website is: http://www.imagovideos.com